"Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim."
-- Nora Ephron, commencement address at Wellesley College
Most of us had read "Heartburn" when it was published thirty years ago. Rereading this book was a pleasure; it felt like visiting an old friend, the one who always made you laugh. The book is funny, honest, and real. During our discussion, one of the members read from Frank Rich's beautiful essay on Nora Ephron called Nora's Secret that he wrote for The New York Magazine right after her death. If you haven't read this, please do. It is an excellent piece about Ephron -- her accomplishments, her effect on others, and the reaction to her death. For example, after her death there were twenty articles about her in the New York Times alone. She was diagnosed with leukemia six years before she died and hardly anyone knew. She continued to work, had many projects going, and continued to mentor young writers.
When we talked about "Heartburn," we kept coming back to the fact that it opened up the public discussion about divorce in a powerful way. It was based on Ephron's own life during the period of time when her husband had an affair with another woman. Ephron was seven months pregnant with her second child. It touched a chord in so many women and to this day the book provokes memories, stories, and comparisons between what so many women lived through and what Ephron lived through. Her story was their story. The miracle was that Ephron could write about such a painful subject in an entertaining and humorous way. We all cited our favorite passages and quotes. And our favorite recipes, since Ephron peppers the story with recipes she loves. The main character Rachel Samsat is a successful cookbook writer. Food and laughter are the glue that holds this woman together. It is also the winning formula that makes this book such a warm and witty classic.
My favorite Nora Ephron quote, though, is the one from her speech at Wellesley College (see above). Many of us have been asked if there is a motto or quote that we try to live by. I think I may have found mine. Ephron inspired us all to be the heroine of our own lives; the life she lived was an example of how it could be done with humor, grace and style.
The lesson from "Heartburn" seems to be: if you push through adversity and find something to laugh about along the way, you will come out stronger in the end. As many people said when the book first came out, "writing well is the best revenge." I would add, cooking well also.
Here is the recipe for Perfect Roast Chicken that our hostess made for us at the book club meeting. It was delicious and we all agreed that Nora would have loved it.
